Couples Therapy
Counselling in Edmonton & St. Albert
Have You And Your Partner Experienced A Breakdown In Communication?
Do you feel unable to work as a team or compromise on important issues?
Are there differences between you that you didn’t foresee when your relationship started?
Have you both gotten so busy with your lives that sex and intimacy have fallen to the bottom of your list of priorities?
Maybe you and your significant other find yourselves arguing in circles—your interactions have become hostile and defensive. Perhaps there’s been infidelity and now you’re wondering if you’ll ever be able to rebuild the trust between you. Or maybe you both get along, but you’re newly married and struggling to blend your families together. As a result, you may be thinking it’s time to see a couples therapist.
You And Your Partner Might Have Differing Goals, Values, And Expectations
Over time, your differences may have become too glaring to ignore. You might find that your “stuff”—the goals, values, and expectations that you bring to the table—are brushing up against your partner’s “stuff.” Your individual relationship histories and past attachment wounds could make it difficult to connect with each other in a healthy way.
For instance, if you were cheated on in the past, you might constantly fear betrayal in your new relationship—even if you have no reason to. Or if you had a tough childhood and your partner didn’t, they might not understand some of the beliefs you hold about child-rearing.
When you don’t understand each other, communication breaks down and intimacy, safety, and support often get left behind. At Summit Counselling Services, our goal is to help you and your partner communicate better, let go of your pasts, and learn to compromise and work together as a team.
All Couples Experience Conflict—The Key Is Being Prepared For It
Every relationship has its pitfalls. Despite what Rom Coms and Instagram might tell you, the honeymoon phase can’t last forever. When it ends, couples have to ask themselves: Now what? How can we keep our relationship healthy and stable even if we’re not head over heels for each other 24/7?
Unfortunately, too many couples just aren’t prepared for the end of the honeymoon phase. The relationship feels so free-flowing and effortless in the beginning that they don’t think they need to discuss their differences. But eventually reality sets in and they have to navigate conflicting expectations about sex, finances, quality time, and parenting. This is why it’s so important for couples to see a therapist and work through their differences early on.
The Problems In A Relationship Aren’t Always Easy To Spot
We are emotional creatures by nature—we fall in love because of an emotional connection to someone else. While that can be a beautiful thing, our emotions often cloud our ability to see a situation clearly and objectively. This makes it hard to work through conflict constructively. In the heat of the moment, we tend to overlook the fact that another person is motivated by their own history of traumas and attachment wounds. Intent on proving ourselves right, we fail to see the deeper motives and triggers underlying someone else’s actions.
This is why it’s so important for couples to have a third party who can help them objectively assess their situation. No matter how committed you and your partner are to working through your challenges, sometimes you need the support of a registered psychologist.
Therapy Can Help Couples Improve Communication, Deepen Their Intimacy, And Fall Back In Love
Many couples think they don’t need counseling when their relationship is going steady. They imagine therapy as a last resort, something that’s only needed if you’re on the brink of divorce. But we encourage couples to get support early on, since it’s much easier to work through your challenges before there are serious issues. Creating a strong foundation in the beginning can increase satisfaction in long-term relationships and give you the tools to improve communication before it becomes a problem.
That said, if you feel that you waited a long time to seek therapy, that’s okay. Therapy can benefit you and your partner no matter where you are on your journey. It provides you with a safe, nonjudgmental space to discuss your concerns, hopes, and desires. This is a chance for both of you to come together, feel heard and understood, and work toward the common goal of improving your connection.
What To Expect In Couples Counselling Sessions
In the beginning, we’ll have both of you fill out an intake form separately that the other person can’t see—that way, each of you feels comfortable sharing honestly about your relationship. The first session will be held with you and your partner together to discuss your goals for therapy. After that, we may have individual sessions so that we can understand your individual histories better.
When the individual sessions are done, we’ll resume meeting together for the majority of sessions. What we work on ultimately depends on what your relationship’s needs are. Our couples therapists are trained to assist you and your partner in understanding each other, improving communication, rebuilding intimacy, and strengthening many other areas of your marriage or relationship.
Creating Your Couples Therapy Plan
The tools and approaches that our practice uses vary from therapist to therapist. Many of our practitioners use the Gottman Method, a form of therapy that seeks to help couples create a solid foundation together by increasing closeness and respect and letting go of resentment. Some of us also utilise Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), which can help you understand how you feel before a conflict arises, allowing you to avoid escalating moments of tension.
Additionally, we have several psychologists who specialize in sex therapy. After all, intimacy is a huge part of romantic relationships and sex is a huge part of life. We know sex isn’t always easy to talk about, but our sex therapists are trained to help you and your partner discuss intimacy in a way that’s comfortable and enriching.
No matter where your relationship is today, we believe that you and your significant other can build a foundation that stands strong for the rest of your lives. The road may not always be easy, but if you’re both committed to working together, it’s possible to create a deeper and more loving connection.
You May Have Some Questions And Concerns About Marriage And Couples Counselling…
We don’t fight all the time—what would we even get out of couples therapy?
Believe it or not, the best time to seek therapy is when your marriage is going well. It’s much easier to solve problems before there are ruptures in the foundation of your relationship. Additionally, counselling can be preemptive and help you anticipate future disagreements over parenting, finances, etc. It’s a chance to work through these issues ahead of time, giving your relationship a head start.
What if the therapist just sides with my partner?
All of our therapists are trained to be objective and make sure both of you feel seen, heard, and understood. Instead of viewing one partner as the issue, we view the issue as the issue—meaning that it’s not “you” vs. “them,” but “both of you” vs. “the problem.” The aim is to help both of you work together toward your agreed-upon goals.
What if my partner doesn’t want to attend couples therapy?
In couples work, it’s important that both partners are active participants. That said, individual counselling is always a possibility if your partner is resistant to coming with you. We can help you do your part to enrich the relationship and give you skills for improving communication and resolving conflict. If your partner sees progress in you, they may be more motivated to attend sessions with you!
Let Go Of Your Pasts And Create A Stronger Foundation Together
With our help and support, we’re confident that you and your significant other can increase satisfaction in your relationship. To learn more about our approach to couples therapy, use our contact form or call 780-217-4665.
Summit Counselling Therapists Who Specialize in Couples Counselling:
To learn more about our team members, click here.
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Couples Counselling | Edmonton & St. Albert Psychologists
Summit Counselling Services
10328 121 St NW, Edmonton, AB T5N 1K8, Canada
#203, 1 Tache St., St. Albert, AB T8N 1B4, Canada
Couples Therapy in Edmonton & St. Albert
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Summit Counselling Services is a counselling clinic located in Central Edmonton. We provide clinical services to children, adolescents, adults, seniors, couples, and families. We have a talented team of Edmonton psychologists, therapists and counsellors with a wide range of specializations and trainings at Summit Counselling Services who would be honoured to walk beside you on your journey. At Summit, we believe in therapy your way. Our goal is to customize your psychotherapy and counselling sessions to best suit your needs. We believe in the differences and unique perspectives each person brings to therapy and incorporate these into our work with you.